A New Year’s Resolution

I’ve spent far too many years making and breaking New Year’s resolutions. Probably because they were so repetitive. I always resolved to: resolution4

Lose ten, twenty, thirty, far too many to be reasonable…pounds.
Work out every day.
Stop being so critical of myself.

Same old, same old, right?

Wrong.

This year, I won’t make those repetitive resolutions again.

I’ve decided to become my own “heroine”!

I’m fifty now, an age it took me a few months to embrace. But now that I have accepted that I did, indeed, turn the big five-oh, I also realize something absolutely amazing.
I’m “okay” the way I am.

resolution1Ponder that for a minute. How many women allow themselves to feel “okay” with the way they are? I’m overweight. I’ve got stretch marks from two babies. Gravity is taking a toll. A workout usually consists of walking my Schnauzer around the block. But I’m “okay” with all those things. I am what I am.

And it’s enough.

Did my age bring on this peace? I think that’s part of it. Something about fifty seemed so damned ominous. Perhaps it’s the mathematics of knowing more than half my life is behind me. Perhaps it’s the notion that I’m getting closer and closer to retirement. Perhaps this is the age of “wisdom.”

Oh, I will have resolutions! Fear not! But they’re going to involve writing. How many books can I write? How many proposals can I get ready? How many words can I write each day? Those will be the things I resolve to work harder on, all of them focusing on my current life goal of being able to retire from teaching and write full-time. I’ve just decided to stop the self-flagellation over not being as skinny as I was at twenty or having a few gray hairs and laugh lines. As I always tell my students, laugh lines are proof that I’ve laughed, and those students are the ones who are giving me the gray hairs.

happynewyear

I wish for all of you a happy, prosperous 2014 full of laughter and love, and I wish for you to be “okay” with you…just the way you are.


Comments

A New Year’s Resolution — 14 Comments

  1. I love this post, Sandy. You’re right, we spend so much time beating ourselves up because we didn’t reach goals which were fairly impossible in the first place. I love this idea of focusing on goals specific to your writing.

  2. Love your post Sandy. I’ve spent a lot of New Years resolving to lose weight only to be disappointed in myself if it doesn’t happen. So this year I’m going to do something a little different. I resolve to eat more vegetables. Maybe I won’t lose weight, but at least I’ll be healthier!

  3. Loved the post. Passing the “50” milepost is just another step forward into another adventure! Besides, self-flagellation is highly overrated.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *